If you know me, you know that I love American Idol. I was watching it before it was cool, and before it was uncool, and before it became cool again. I have had American Idol watching parties attended by friends who are at the top of their professions and always smell good. I love that the show is wrought with drama and talent and hate that it has too effin many commercials (thank goodness for DVR).

Last night, they narrowed it down to the top 36. Here’s my take:

Von Smith – nice kid, great voice and all, but better reserved for musical theatre. Clay Aiken, anyone? Or maybe that cruise I’ve never been on.

Taylor Vaifanua – Victim of the producers not showing enough of her. Don’t know much about her yet. But from the show so far, my conclusion is : meh.

Tatiana Nicole Del Toro – I get that the producers have to maintain an element of drama and annoyance, and this girl really fits the bill. But for the reals? Tatiana needs to be Rihanna’d. She’ll be Number One, though. Number One on that anti-idol website. She has a future in telenovelas.

Tatiana Drama

Stevie Wright – Has a voice (and looks) well beyond her 16 years. She’s good though. I think she should be in it for a while.

Stephen Fowler – Dude, this guy screwed the pooch on numerous occasions. He does have a nice voice and fun hair, but it’s painful to watch him sing with the closed eyes and mouth contortions that look like someone is hammering porcupine quills into his nailbeds.

Scott Macintyre – Not only does this guy fit the producer’s “inspiration” category, but he’s got vocal chops to back it (though he does get a little weak without the piano). He’ll definitely need help from the contestant’s stylist, though. Just because he can’t see doesn’t mean he gets a bye for having unkempt hair and ill-managed scruff. And did Kara REALLY say “we’ll see you later”?

Rickie Brady – Who? Another airtime victim. He’s probably one of the producers’ “sleepers” though, so I’ll hold out on judgment. Until next week. There is, after all, a little Simon in all of us.

Nick Mitchell – aka Norman Gentle. Yes, he’s obnoxious. But he does it in a way that isn’t suffocating and isn’t predictable (unlike Drama Tatiana). I would love to see this guy do well. He really DOES have a good voice, in character or not. The producers are going to have their hands full with this one.

Gentle Nick

Nathaniel Marshall – Someone give back Elton John’s clothes. He’s too young to be that over the top with drama. He can actually sing, I’ll give him that. But I think there were vocally stronger, more emotionally stable contestants.

Nat aka Elton

Mishavonna Henson – Yeah, she can sing, but I dunno dawg. She’s cutesy sometimes, but there’s more memorable (even if their voices are worse) people out there so she needs to bring it.

Michael Sarver – I like this guy, and not just because we work in the same destroying-the-earth’s-natural-resources industry. He does need to get a new shirt, though. He wore that ruffled white tuxedo shirt too many times. Yes, I noticed that. No matter what, this guy can make a country album.

Megan Corkrey– don’t really membah her.

Matt Giraud – totally lovin’ this guy, the piano dueler. Picks great songs for his voice and style. He might be too narrow, though. We’ll see. I hope he goes far.

Matt Brietzke – welder, shmelder. He was just awww-ite to me. Nice story, but that Osmond boy had a better voice.

Lil Rounds – One of my front runner gals. She packs some power rounds with her voice and I’m liking her tons so far.

Power Rounds

Kristen McNamara – How did she manage to steal the worst of Jessica Simpson and Britney Spears’ clothing? So, yeah, she was the ‘collected’ one with the group day drama. But she was smug. And I don’t like that. And her singing, if it was any good, was overshadowed by the attitude. For me, dawg, not any better than Tatiana.

Kris Allen – burh? Don’t remember him at all, but he’s from Conway, AR and anyone I’ve ever known from Conway is good looking and sweet, so he has at least that going for him.

Kendall Beard – she had to go to Puerto Rico to audition. A little too Pickler-clone-ish. Nice commercial name, but she’s just ok for me. Even if she is a Texan, y’all.

Kara DioGuardi – Great voice, commercial look. But she seems conflicted with the tops she wears. Like she wants to show the cleavage, but then she’s uncomfortable because she’s always pulling up on her shirt. Ok, so, yeah, she’s not a contestant. But she’s my new TV girlfriend and this is my blog so stuff it.

My TV G/F

Kai Kalama – like the I Stopped My Life To Take Care Of Mom story. Yaminesque, may his mom rest in peace. Kai’s got fun hair, a great name, and a wonderful voice to match. We’ll see where this one goes. I hope far.

Ju’Not Joyner – Did Ju Not see much airtime on him either? From what I can tell, he’s ok, but I’m not feeling good about this one.

Jorge Nunez-Mendez – puhleez. I get that they had to keep an authentic Puerto Rican on the show to justify their auditions in Puerto Rico. But is Jorge the best they could do? He ees not goot enuf for da me.

Jesse Langseth – lots of confidence. And a powerful, rustic voice that doesn’t seem to match her look. But she could do really well if she separates herself from the pack. She’ll need to young it up, though.

Jeanine Vailes – This one came in under the radar. Maybe another sleeper? Jury’s out.

Jasmine Murray – Another female front runner. Talented, for sure. Gifted in voice and polished in look well beyond her young years. But still manages to keep it young.

Jackie Tohn – Two front-runners in a row! She’s a visual mix of Cheryl Crow and Alanis Morisette (must be the hair?), has a voice similar to Joni Mitchell, but can rock it. Fun personality to boot!

Jackie Fun

Felicia Barton – she got back on the show after the Pacitti controversy. She’ll have to scrape to stay much longer.

Danny Gokey – okie gokey, so this Robert Downy Jr look-alike (thanks, sis!) has a heart-strings story about losing his wife recently, but his vocals have been incredible on their own, too. He might be too narrow in his vocal scope, but we don’t know that simply because he’s picked great songs for his voice. He effin rocked the song “I Hope You Dance”. But he needs to not wear dark shirts because the pit stains were distracting.

Okie Gokey

Casey Carlson – she’s just a’ight. But super cute in a Mandy Moore kind of way. And AI likes super cute. Incidently, are we sure this isn’t Mandy?

Brent Keith – talented. I see him in at least the top 25.

Arianna Afsar – Sweet wittto Arianna can sing. Her commercial packaging is probably greater than her voice. But I’m liking her. Even with that ghost shadow of Randy in the background.

Wittle Bitty Arianna

Anoop Desai– I love me some Anooooooop! He’s the coolest nerd ever. And damn the boy can sing! I’m not sure how far he’ll get on the commercial factor, but I’d love to see him in the top 10 at least.

Anooooop!

Anne Marie Boskovich – cute, but that’s about it. Listening to her sing is like being really thirsty and driving through the drive-thru for a fountain drink, but you don’t take a sip until two miles down the road and it doesn’t have quite enough carbonation, but it has enough to keep you from driving back and demanding a new one. And you decide right there you aren’t going back to that drive-thru for a fountain drink ever again. Prove me wrong, Bosky!

Allison Iraheta – yeah, she’s 16 and can sing well and controlled at that age, but she doesn’t stand out. Maybe that’s a “yet”, though. I mean, remember Jordin Sparks? She didn’t Bring It until the top 10.

Alexis Grace – you would SO not expect such a resounding command come from her mouth, but she’s pretty damn good. I hope this young mom gets far.

Alexis Rocks

Alex Wagner-Trugman – this kid can sing, but looks like the brain from my calculus class in high school. Who was that nerdy kid a season or two ago that transformed over the course of the show, could sing, but still got eliminated, but was better for it? Or maybe he came in second? Alex will be like him.

Adam Lambert – not only is he my front-runner for the guys, but so far, he’s my pick for Season 8 winner. And it’s not just because he wears eye liner better than me or because I am jealous of his hair. This guy has a cool confidence, an ease on stage, and doesn’t carry that rocker-I-am-better-than-this-show attitude. Me likey, me likey.

Adam Bomb

Until next time!

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