I had this post all written out in my head but it was going be the length of those horrid Norton Anthology Readers and my fingers threw up at the thought of typing it all out so here’s a longish short story version of the adoption happenings’ experience.

  • We flew my mom into town last Wednesday morning from San Antonio with the plan to immediately drive back to San Antonio.  This was conspired by the Beloved and my mom because I was naively under the impression that I could make the 200 mile trip with the kids on my own.  The once 3.5 hour drive only took a little over 4 hours.  
  • Mom, aka Grandma G, helped me with the kids’ Wednesday night feedings since the Beloved was still at home working and wouldn’t fly into San Antonio until Thursday night.  They only woke up twice – each – to eat, but I slept less because my mama bear ears were like those pointer hunting dogs.
  • Thursday, I packed up the kiddles and headed over to my sister and brother-in-law’s house.  BIL is a stay-at-home-parent and this day more than all others was I totally in awe at his calling to be at home with E!  He was great, patient, helpful, good company, and his mom came over to help with the three kids for a few hours that afternoon.  Can we just say THANKFUL?  And to show their appreciation, the RJBs refluxed in their house.  Good thing I had come prepared with TOWELS – the new burp cloth.  E! was helpful, too.  She pushed the papasan swing while Birdie was in it and it is safe to assume that Birdie will be prepared for her first roller coaster ride.  And the cutest thing?  E! read a book to the kids – on her own initiative – in her own language – even turning the pages towards the RJBs so they could see the pictures.  HOW CRAZY CUTE IS THAT?
  • The Beloved’s flight got in at 8:30 pm on Thursday and by then I had re-loaded the kiddles and we were now at my brother and sister-in-law’s house where we’d be the next two nights.  My SIL is VERY tidy and clean and orderly and organized. I am Type A, but she makes me look like I am as productive as one step above a sloth. I thought she might faint when we came in and went to work babyfying her house. My mom even created a diaper station. ON THEIR BREAKFAST BAR ISLAND! I thought SIL’s eyes would pop out. We covered their WHITE CLOTH CHAIRS at the kitchen table with towels, set up a swing smack in the middle of the living room, and had a bottle station set up by the previously immaculate and cleared off counter. It wasn’t that I was TRYING to be inconsiderate or shocking, it’s just that the babies require this kind of set up. I wasn’t sure I was convincing her that this preparation was actually helping to PRESERVE furniture, rather than wreak havoc on the decor. Gotta give it to her, though, she went with the flow even if her blood pressure was skyrocketing.  And in an effort to let my brother and SIL know what they might expect when Putter is born, they both threw up.  And then again, for good measure. 
  • Lack of sleep was starting to wear on me, so it’s only natural that by the time the RJBs went into their witching hourS, I was exhausted. My mom came over to help with their bath/feeding time. But really, she ended up helping ME by taking over while I went to pick up the Beloved from the airport. Had it been only 36 hours? On the way to the arrival gate, I didn’t as much as turn up the volume of the radio what with the sounds of throwing up and crying (my own included) and baby music replaying in my head.
  • As if the RJBs knew we were exhausted, they only woke up once each in the night.  And Jen and my mom took the 1am bottle so I could catch some shut eye.  
  • Friday morning was our first test with we’ve-got-to-get-both-ourselves-ready-and-presentable-and-the-kids-too-and-fed-all-before-seven-ayem.  And we totally did it!!  Little wins.
  • We left at 7:30 a.m. to go to the courthouse for the 9:00 a.m. adoption hearing.  There to witness the event was Tricia, my SIL, who epitomizes Being There For Family; and my mom.  The beauty and irony there is that when I came out to her twelve years ago and came home for the holidays, we exchanged books.  Mine to her: a PFLAG book, her’s to me: something about a praying-away-the-gay camp.  LOOK HOW FAR WE’VE COME.  
  • In honor of the adoption, Bruiser made it all the more memorable when 10 seconds before our names were called to go up HE THREW UP IN THE COURTROOM.  IN VIEW OF THE BAILIFF.  AND THE JUDGE.  DSC_3190.JPG

    At least it wasn’t on the judge’s gavel.  

  • The event was short and sweet and MONUMENTAL.  The judge had us raise our right hands, swear to tell the truth and all that, asked me if I was aware of the fact that the Beloved would be their mom forever, and asked the Beloved, as he glanced over at Bruiser, if she was really really really sure she was crazy enough to adopt the RJBs.  We all said yes.  Right there in a courtroom of family law in the state of Texas.  Amen.  
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  • Friday night, we celebrated by getting takeout from Chester’s Hamburgers, the best hamburgers this side of the North Pole.  We dined at brother and SIL’s house, along with E!, sister, and BIL.  Dessert?  Cleaning up more baby reflux!  
  • Saturday morning, we packed everything up again and headed back over to Grandma G’s where she was hosting a joint baby shower for my sister and my SIL.  Baby S is due to be E!’s new sister within a couple weeks.  And brother and SIL’s baby, Putter, is due next month.  The RJBs were welcomed guests, as several of the folks who were at this shower had also been at the one for the RJBs back in January.  Fun to see them on the outside.  So many women there glad to hold the babies that the Beloved and I actually got a one hour nap Saturday afternoon.  So good we were feeling that we decided we should feed the RJBs and head back home.  We figured that if we were already tired, we might as well be tired at home Saturday night rather than wake up tired Sunday and still have to drive back – in the heat of the day.
  • So Saturday evening, we gave the kids their bottle at 5pm and got on the road at 6pm.  Since they are still eating about every three hours during the day, we stopped off at the famous Buckey’s in Luling to feed them at 8pm.  It was a breezy evening, so we parked the car and sat on a swing out in front of the store and fed them.  I am not even kidding.  How Texan is that?  They ate.  Birdie threw up.  We changed them in the cleanest public bathrooms ever.  And we were back on the road at 9p.m.  We decided to stop at the next McDonald’s to get something to eat for us.  BIG MISTAKE.  Both the RJBs woke up pissed.  Bruiser was satisfied with his paci.  Birdie wouldn’t have it.  So we stopped in Columbus long enough to get some formula from the trunk.  Lesson learned?  KEEP THE FORMULA IN THE FRONT OF THE CAR.  All that hysteria from Birdie and you know how much she ate?  Half an ounce.  HALF AN OUNCE and she was out cold.  Which was great because the rest of the trip I was wedged into the back seat between the car seats, holding a paci in Bruiser’s mouth with my left hand, checking in on Birdie with my right, head leaned forward talking to the Beloved so we could hear each other over the mix of Baby Einstein and George Winston.  And we couldn’t have been happier.  The trip only took FIVE HOURS.  
  • When we got home, we unloaded only what was necessary, gave the kids a bath, gave them a bottle, and we ALL slept until daylight.  Sunday, the four of us just napped, read books, played, and relaxed.  A great ending to a great weekend.
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