Dear RaJenBabies,

This last week has been challenging. I’ve developed this rash-like itchiness that is called PUPPPS. I probably don’t let you sleep very well at night because I wake myself up, scratching my belly so much that it’s bleeding. At Monday’s doctor appointment, the doctor considered it severe enough to prescribe some medication and a stronger topical steroidal ointment. And although it’s not harming you, it really wears on me knowing that it’s passing through to you. We’re in the delicate time zone of between-36-and-37-weeks (37 Weeks is term for twins) and so this balancing, of trying to obtain relief for me while minimizing the impact to you is very tricky. Do we delivery you sooner because my blood pressure is creeping up? Or because the burning/itching is so intolerable? Or do we give me medications that pass to you, but in so doing gives you an opportunity to grow another golden 24 hours at a time? This is like walking a tightwire.

We’re taking it day-to-day now, though, and thankfully, today is a better day than yesterday was. And hopefully, tomorrow will be a better day than today. So that’s progress. And the greatest thing? The greatest thing is that the two of you are snug and doing well in the womb. All the more reason to continue baking you just a little longer.

I guess, these last days in my belly, it’s really hit me. Hit me that we’re about to be parents to you forever and ever. Hit me that life as me and Matou and the two of you know it will be forever altered. And we’re excited, and honestly, a little apprehensive. Not scared because we don’t want you on the outside, but because we want to be the best parents to you both, and yet, we have no instruction manual or experience.

We are so grateful that God has picked us to be your parents. Everything is so temporary. And we’re just blessed to borrow the miracles that are you during our time on Earth.

No matter what, we’ll be seeing you within the next seven to ten days, our little RaJen Creations.

There is so much we want to say to you, me and Matou. But I don’t think we’d recognize the words if they were blocking the stairs in all capitals and bright colors. But this we promise you, we are ever ready to shower you with love and affection. And that is a universal language.

Mommy and Matou

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